Green burials: Cremation vs. Resomation?

The Greenest Way to Die - Resomation? By Katherine Butler,  Want to go green in death? Here’s a process that may allow you to do just that. Resomation involves an alkaline hydrolysis process that dissolves a body into both a liquid and a powdery white mass. Experts call it the green alternative to cremation, which notoriously releases nitrogen oxide, carbon monoxide, and sulfur dioxide into the atmosphere.
The process is legal in several U.S. states, and one undertaker wants to bring it to Belgium. But as American Public Media Marketplace reports, resomation is being met with some trepidation in Europe.  The process, which emits none of the toxic carbon ash common with crematoriums, uses much less energy than other death preparation practices. It is a zero-emissions process. The body is placed in a bag and lowered into a Resomator. The Resomator is filled with water and potassium hydroxide, which is heated to around 160 degrees Celsius. The result is a greenish, DNA-free liquid and a powdery mass of white bone. In the United States, it is a common way to dispose of bodies donated to medical science.
Now Belgian undertaker Bruno Quirijnen wants to bring the process, which was developed by a Scottish firm, to Antwerp. Quirijnen hopes city official will approve the process. As he told American Public Media, ”People don’t like to have chimneys in their back yard. So with resomation, you don’t have that problem. It’s very natural and it’s more eco-friendly.” 
But not everyone sees resomation as a viable solution for their post-mortem existence on Earth. Many everyday citizens are completely opposed to the idea of dissolving their body after death

Funeral homes subsidizing services for the poor

Funeral homes subsidizing services for the poor - thestar.com

Always a problem, even for Mozart... many cities are skimping on charity burials. Consider your location burial society as an alternative, and a Humanist funeral...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Local funeral homes say they can no longer afford to spend millions a year subsidizing dignified farewells for the poorest Torontonians.
They are preparing to lobby city hall for a raise in the $2,208.88 “paupers’ funeral” subsidy, arguing it is now so outstripped by costs that the private businesses have become part of the cradle-to-grave social safety net.
There were 1,600 subsidized funerals across Toronto last year and only a handful were spare affairs for those unidentified or with no next of kin. Most — available to people on social assistance or provincial disability benefits — included full rites with visitation, service and motorcade.
Toronto & District Funeral Directors, in a report to councillors, says each of those funerals cost almost $5,500 to provide. Collectively, voluntarily accepting them costs its members between $1.8 million and $3.9 million each year, the association says.
“These small businesses can no longer afford to subsidize the cost of social service funerals,” and the problem is province-wide, states the report, obtained by the Star.
The association isn’t threatening a boycott like the one staged last year by legal aid lawyers.
But if the subsidy — set by municipalities but funded 80 per cent by the province — doesn’t rise, the association says members will have no choice but to consider stripped-down services, possibly with no visitation, services at graveside or crematorium rather than in a chapel, and fewer cars or no motorcade altogether.
“We have always provided those funerals at a loss, but the gap wasn’t so big and we didn’t do as many,” said Jim Cardinal, owner of Cardinal Funeral Homes. He calculated that his business alone loses $100,000 annually providing about 50 such funerals.

Argentina legalizes gay marriage

Argentina legalizes gay marriage
BUENOS AIRES (AFP) – Argentina on Thursday became the first country in Latin America to legalize same-sex marriage, following a landmark Senate vote carried live on national television.

The law, backed by the center-left government of President Cristina Kirchner, was adopted in a 33-27 vote after 15 hours of debate. In this majority Roman Catholic country, some had reservations, but the law passed.

"It is a historic day," said ruling party leader Miguel Pichetto. Opposition Radical senator Gerardo Morales said Argentine society has changed, stressing that the bill was aimed at guaranteeing the rights of minorities.

Hundreds of people outside Congress cheered when the bill passed. Some chanted "Equality, Equality." Some tearful couples embraced.

Spain to get church for same-sex marriages

Spain to get church for same-sex marriages
MADRID — Spain, which has become a world leader in gay rights in recent years, is to get its first gay Christian church to celebrate marriages between same-sex couples, a news report said Sunday.

The US-based Metropolitan Community Churches (MCC) is to open a congregation in Madrid in October, the daily El Mundo said. On its website, MCC said it was founded California in 1968 as "the world's first church group with a primary, positive ministry to gays, lesbians, bisexual and transgender persons." It now claims 43,000 members in 300 congregations in 22 countries.

El Mundo said a lesbian couple, both Spaniards living in Canada, have come to Madrid to register an MCC congregation with the justice ministry which they expect to open in October.

The blood diamond is making a comeback

The blood diamond is making a comeback
JOHANNESBURG, 30 June 2010 (IRIN) - Reform of the Kimberley Process Certification Scheme (KPCS) is becoming more urgent as controversy over Zimbabwe's diamond sales pushes the international initiative designed to stem the flow of conflict diamonds towards paralysis. At the KPCS meeting in Tel Aviv, Israel, on 21-24 June, Zimbabwe dominated proceedings, and delegates were given a rude reminder of the growing disillusionment when diamond business magnate Martin Rapaport embarked on a three-day hunger strike to protest against "corrupt governments [that] have turned the KP on its head; instead of eliminating human rights violations the KP is legitimizing them".

Eli Izhakoff, president of the World Diamond Council (WDC), acknowledged that decision-making by consensus had "played a role in maintaining the KP coalition, but it also has created a situation in which one participant has the power to block progress without even having to declare the reason for doing so".

He suggested amending the decision-making process, and that a two-thirds or 75 percent majority might be "a viable solution". The WDC also announced that an unprecedented mini-summit would be held at its July 2010 annual meeting in St Petersburg, Russia, to try to break the Zimbabwe impasse.

The KPCS, formed in 2002, meets twice a year, bringing together governments, the diamond industry and NGOs to police the trade in “blood diamonds”. Its 49 members represent 75 countries, covering about 99.8 percent of global production. More than a year of wrangling over whether Zimbabwe has or has not met the scheme's minimum requirements has produced deadlock rather than resolution, with attention focused on alleged human rights violations by the Zimbabwean army against civilians in the 66,000ha Marange diamond fields, said to be among the world's richest.

Annie Dunnebacke, a campaigner for Global Witness, a UK-based NGO that was among the prime movers in the creation of the KPCS, told IRIN that civil society had been calling for reforms of the certification system, including an overhaul of the decision-making process.

My two dads: Gay penguins become parents

My two dads: Gay penguins become parents
Two 'gay' male penguins have hatched an egg and are rearing the adopted chick.

The birds, at Bremerhaven Zoo in northern Germany, were given an egg rejected by its biological parents. Named 'Z' and 'Vielpunkt', the penguins became famous when they refused to separate or to mate with females.

Joachim Schoene, a zoo vet, said; 'Another pair abandoned an egg by pushing it out of their nest and so we placed it in the care of the homosexual penguins. They accepted the egg immediately and took turns in incubating it with their body heat. They did this for 35 days and the baby was born on April 25.

'It is in a little cave in the enclosure which is fiercely guarded by one or the other at all times - so we don't know yet if we have a little boy penguin or a little girl one.' The two daddies feed their offspring with fish mash that they chew up and regurgitate into its ever-open beak

Bremerhaven Zoo in northern Germany made headlines in 2005 as it investigated homosexual traits in penguins. Gay rights activists were outraged after the zoo flew in female penguins to try to get them to reproduce with three pairs of male penguins who had been seen trying to mate with one another and hatch chicks from stones.

But now the zoo has relented, leaving the six gay penguins to live happily with their chosen mates - Z and Vielpunkt among them.

No Gay Marriage, But Domestic Partners Now Get Ceremonies In NYC

No Gay Marriage, But Domestic Partners Now Get Ceremonies In NYC
NEW YORK — Gelixa Ortiz and Elizabeth Rivera waited years for the chance to formally join their lives and declare their union in front of their loved ones. On Friday, they had their moment as one of New York City's first couples to have an official domestic partner ceremony.
Rivera, wearing a knee-length white slip dress with dark brown beading at the neckline, and Ortiz, in a chocolate brown sleeveless top and pants, exchanged rings and made their 10-year relationship an official domestic partnership in a ceremony conducted by New York City's clerk, Michael McSweeney.
"By the authority vested in me in accordance of the rules of the city of New York, I now formally pronounce you domestic partners," McSweeney said, as 13 guests looked on, some in tears.
New York City has allowed couples to register as domestic partners since 1993, but it wasn't until this week that the city began granting them the option of a ceremony at the clerk's office. It's the same as what they offer couples who are legally marrying, and the cost is $25.
The domestic partner ceremony does not carry with it any additional legal benefits, and gay marriage still is not legal in New York state.
Perhaps because the new policy at the city clerk's office is ceremonial only, the city has seen few couples take advantage of the offer.The change took effect Thursday, and on the first day just three couples had ceremonies. On Friday, there were just two more.
In 2009, 5,500 couples registered as domestic partners in New York City.

Portugal ratifies gay marriage law

Portugal ratifies gay marriage law

Portugal's conservative president said he is reluctantly ratifying a law allowing gay marriage, making the predominantly Roman Catholic country the sixth in Europe to let same-sex couples wed.

President Anibal Cavaco Silva said he would not veto the bill because majority liberal politicians would only overturn his decision...He said he was setting aside his "personal convictions," though he did not elaborate and did not take reporters' questions.

The country's parliament passed the Socialist government-backed bill in January, with the support of all of Portugal's left-of-centre parties, who together have a majority. Right-of-centre parties opposed the measure and demanded a national referendum.

Elsewhere in Europe, gay marriage is permitted in Belgium, the Netherlands, Spain, Sweden and Norway. As well, five US states and Washington, DC, legalised same-sex marriage, as have Canada and South Africa.

Obama extends health care rights to gay partners | TPM News Pages

Obama extends health care rights to gay partners | TPM News Pages

In a move hailed as a step toward fairness for same-sex couples, President Barack Obama is ordering that nearly all hospitals allow patients to say who has visitation rights and who can help make medical decisions, including gay and lesbian partners.

The White House on Thursday released a statement by Obama instructing his Health and Human Services secretary to draft rules requiring hospitals that receive Medicare and Medicaid payments to grant all patients the right to designate people who can visit and consult with them at crucial moments.

The designated visitors should have the same rights that immediate family members now enjoy, Obama's instructions said. It said Medicare-Medicaid hospitals, which include most of the nation's facilities, may not deny visitation and consultation privileges on the basis of race, color, national origin, religion, sex, sexual orientation, gender identity or disability.

New Same sex wedding mag: Equally Wed

Equally Wed  US only. (or you could all just come up to Canada, you know :-) Nice fun articles, including suit-fitting for women. Not much political discussion as yet, more focus on style and honeymoons.

Ethical Baby-Naming ceremonies

We all welcome babies, and we all have a responsibility to make their world a safe and welcoming one. Here are a few excepts from a ceremony we're going to perform on Saturday - may all the world's children have a name, and have a family, and have hope and peace.

"In welcoming and naming a child with this ceremony, we celebrate one of life’s continuing miracles, the birth of a human being and the continuation of humankind. We rejoice that this child has been born into the concern and care not only of her parents, but also of this gathering and community.

The phrase 'it takes a village to raise a child' is true. While the task of nurturing children belongs mainly to parents, it also belongs to all of you, family, friends and colleagues who are gathered here today.

Article 7 of the Convention on Children's Rights says:
1. "The child shall be registered immediately after birth and shall have the right from birth to a name, the right to acquire a nationality and. as far as possible, the right to know and be cared for by his or her parents". Not all children in the world enjoy this right today, so it is all the more important that you are here to recognize Elizabeth, and let her know that you care for her and her parents.

For you are representing the larger community in which this child will grow up. It is through you that she will come to know her community and her world. By your support, example and encouragement you have a part to play in the development of this child to her fullest potential.

We give the child a name in this ceremony, and by doing so we declare that the child is an individual, a unique and a separate person with a dignity and a life of her own.

A name once given will be associated forever with a face, a voice, a walk, a laugh and all the other idiosyncrasies our families and friends recognize that reflect this child’s individuality.

This child’s name will be spoken, whispered, shouted, cried, sung and written – thousands of times, impersonally and meaningfully – by family, friends, neighbors, school chums, teachers, doctors, colleagues, loves, strangers, and maybe by children and grandchildren. It will define her identity.

In every birth, blessed is the wonder.
In every creation, blessed is the new beginning.
In every child, blessed is life.
In every hope, blessed is the potential.
In every transition, blessed is the beginning.
In every existence, blessed are the possibilities.
In every love, blessed are the tears.
In every life, blessed is the love.

There are three names by which a person is called:
One which her father and mother call her,
And one which people call her,
And one which she earns for herself.
The best one of these is the one that she earns for herself.

In giving Elizabeth her name we declare that we will respect her as herself and give her the freedom to be herself. In naming and welcoming this child through a public ceremony, we declare that all of us are responsible for the care and development of all children. It is our task to give them our ideals and our hopes. It is our task to give them a world of peace and justice in which to grow.

Here before us are three symbols of life. The first is water, symbolizing the great stream of humanity flowing down to us from the past, and on whose vast currents each of us is carried. With this water we recognize you, Elizabeth Kathleen Sofia as part of the stream of humanity from generations past, as you are now, and all that you will become. May goodness, truth and honour go with you.

Elizabeth the names you are given are a symbol of your unique self. You are a never-to-be repeated person, whose life will ultimately be what you make it. You were created in love. As you become one who loves, you too will become a creator. To this end you are now named and dedicated.

The second symbol is the light of knowledge. We will now ask the parents and sponsors to light a candle, a symbol of the fire of knowledge within all of us. They will then light the Naming candle of ELIZABETH, saying 'We promise to do our best to light your path with knowledge and wisdom, that you may pass on the light of understanding in your own turn, to those who wait for you'.

For the third symbol, we give Elizabeth a flower - the beauty and freshness of life, and the meaning of this dedication. No flower grows alone, apart from sunshine and the rain, apart from the soil from which it grows. So, too, no child grows up alone, and all of you are here for this child, in all the seasons and the times of her days. We dedicate ourselves to the task of nourishing the beauty and freshness of this child and of all children.

In giving Elizabeth her name we declare that we will respect her as herself and give her the freedom to be herself. In naming and welcoming this child through a public ceremony, we declare that all of us are responsible for the care and development of all children. It is our task to give them our ideals and our hopes. It is our task to give them a world of peace and justice in which to grow."

First Gay couple wed in Latin America

BUENOS AIRES, Argentina (AP) -- Two Argentine men were joined Monday in Latin America's first same-sex marriage, traveling to the southernmost tip of the Americas to find welcoming spot to wed.

Gay rights activists Jose Maria Di Bello and Alex Freyre were married in Ushauaia, the capital of Argentina's Tierra del Fuego state, in a ceremony witnessed by sate and federal officials.

"My knees didn't stop shaking," Di Bello said. "We are the first gay couple in Latin America to marry."

The couple had previously tried to marry in the Argentine capital of Buenos Aires but were thwarted by city officials citing conflicting judicial rulings. Argentina's Constitution is silent on whether marriage must be between a man and a woman, effectively leaving the matter to state and city officials.

Tierra del Fuego Gov. Fabiana Rios said in a statement that gay marriage "is an important advance in human rights and social inclusion and we are very happy that this has happened in our state."

Ethical gift: Give a child a name

This is the charity appeal we have decided to support with donations from our weddings.
For Canadian donations, see PLANCanada

Slumdog Millionaire star Anil Kapoor donated his entire fee for the movie to Plan’s birth registration campaign. You can lend your support for just $25.

Article 7 of the Convention on Children's Rights says:

1. The child shall be registered immediately after birth and shall have the right from birth to a name, the right to acquire a nationality and. as far as possible, the right to know and be cared for by his or her parents.

Unicef and Foster Parents Plan (Plan International) recently found and registered 50 million 'missing' children.

Over four years and across three continents and 32 countries, PLAN has helped to protect hundreds of thousands of children in danger of being trafficked, and girls as young as 12 being forced into illegal marriages – and it is now also saving untold numbers of unborn girls from being aborted because they are the "wrong sex". It is that very rare thing: a global good news story.

It is a mission to give millions of children in the developing world something that is taken for granted: the registration of their birth and, with it, an official existence. Before the campaign – mounted by the international children's charity Plan – there were parts of the world where registration was rare. In Cambodia, for instance, as late as 2005, 96 per cent of the population went unregistered. Without registration, there can be no birth certificate, no identity card, no passport, no proof of age or parentage. Thus, millions are at increased risk of being press-ganged as child soldiers or prostitutes, of not being returned to their families if liberated, of having only limited access to healthcare and education, and being deprived of their legal rights.

The Count Every Child scheme is attempting the registration at birth of every baby in the world. In a report published tomorrow, Plan tells the remarkable story of how it registered 40m citizens. In some countries, it has transformed registration rates, and pressured governments to waive the costs of logging a birth. The result is that a further 153 million people are now eligible for free registration.

Yet the task remains colossal. According to Unicef, 51m children born every year do not officially exist. In some rural communities in Asia, Africa and Latin America, more than 90 per cent of children are not registered at birth. In a conference tomorrow in London, Desmond Tutu and the Slumdog Millionaire actor Anil Kapoor will appeal to governments and non-governmental organisations to learn from, and repeat, Plan's unprecedented success.

Why is registration so low? A lack of awareness among parents and communities, a fear of persecution through identification, no money, poor public transport and illiteracy all work together to stop parents registering their children. And poorly trained registrars and inadequate registration systems are widespread.

There are an estimated 300,000 child soldiers fighting wars around the world. While a birth certificate cannot prevent a child from being kidnapped and forced to fight, it is a vital tool in efforts to reunite rescued children with their families. In Uganda, where the birth registration system collapsed, children rescued from the Lord's Resistance Army often wait months while officials try to track down their villages and families.

And prosecutions against abductors will only succeed if there is proof that the alleged child soldiers were children when recruited. One lawyer in the Philippines said 50 per cent of cases involving forced prostitution and child labour fail because a child does not have proof of age or identity.

Children can be trafficked within their own country or across borders and continents to work as domestic slaves, prostitutes or in cannabis factories. In 2002, Suborna, a seven-year-old from Bangladesh, was kidnapped and trafficked into India but was abandoned near a police checkpoint as her kidnappers fled. She was taken in by a village leader but had no idea where she was from. A local magistrate organised a radio announcement which her family heard, and her father travelled to India to collect her. But the magistrate refused to release Suborna until he produced her birth certificate, which thankfully he had in Bangladesh. Without this, Suborna may never have returned to her family.

A child who is arrested may be prosecuted as an adult if there is no proof of age. A Vietnamese "woman" caught working in a brothel in Europe is likely to be deported as a criminal, whereas a 16-year-old will be treated as a victim of kidnap, trafficking and forced labour, repatriated to her family or helped to seek asylum.

Plan reports cases of boys as young as seven in Bangladesh in court for

murder and rape. But the country's Birth Registration Act, which came into force in 2006 mainly as a result of the campaign, has meant that 40 per cent of Bangladeshis have received a birth certificate, and another 30 per cent have been registered. Workers focused on children living on the edges of society and helped more than 5m, including 28,000 street children in Dhaka, to acquire official identities.

It is almost impossible for an unregistered adult to work legally, so they are forced to take low-paid, hazardous jobs or become involved in crime. They may be unable to get a bank account or apply for a loan or benefits. They may be unable to vote; they will never pay tax. A missing child becomes a lost adult. Awawou, 18, lives in a small village in East Mono, Togo. Her father died shortly after her birth and her illiterate mother did not know about birth registration. Because she was unregistered Awawou was turned down by the local school. Though her grandmother finally convinced the headmaster to let her attend, she was unable to sit her final primary school exams and so could not continue her education; the late birth registration fee in this west African country is nearly £7, which her family could not afford. Awawou has spent several years working in order to save enough money and has finally sat her exams. She hopes to become a dressmaker.

Plan mobilises workers, volunteers, celebrities, communities and governments, using text messages, radio and TV advertising campaigns, and mobile registration trucks to change attitudes and beliefs, improve awareness, reduce costs and cut the distance people have to travel. Simple stuff, but it worked.

The abortion of female foetuses still occurs in countries such as India and China where boys are preferred for cultural or economic reasons. This has distorted the gender balance in some areas; in the Indian state of Bihar there are six girls for every 10 boys. A pilot project in four Indian states monitors every pregnant woman until she gives birth and registers the child. It will now be replicated by Unicef across four more states.

Identity documents are often destroyed or lost as people try to escape war or natural disaster. After the Asian tsunami it was common for several traumatised parents to try to claim the same toddler from refugee camps, according to Nadya Kassam from Plan. Matching up relatives with children who were trying to cope with the tsunami's devastation took months. Plan has since provided plastic folders and laminated birth certificates for communities prone to natural disasters or war, such as Indonesia, Sri Lanka and Vietnam.

Blood Diamonds on the way back

Kimberley Process failing Africa - campaigners

KINSHASA, (Reuters) - The diamond industry's Kimberley Process is failing due to a lack of accountability and follow-up, paving the way for an illegal trade that could see a return of conflict stones to world markets, campaigners said.

The certification scheme, designed to eliminate the trade in so-called "blood diamonds", was set up in 2003 in the wake of devastating civil wars in Angola, Sierra Leone, and Liberia, which were largely financed by the illicit diamond trade.

Before its implementation, conflict stones made up about 15 percent of the world market. Though they are believed to account for less than 1 percent of stones bought and sold today, millions of carats produced annually remain untraceable.

"The only thing they really need to be able to do is to track diamonds in Africa, in countries coming out of conflict, and they simply can't," said Ian Smillie, co-author of an annual review of the industry... in 2008, Congo produced more than 33 million carats, accounting for around 20 percent of the world diamond market. However, the study found that nearly half of the country's exported stones were untraceable. "The case of Congo is absolutely emblematic of the problems plaguing the Kimberley Process," said Elly Harrowell, a campaigner with conflict resource watchdog group Global Witness.

...in 2008, in a move recognised and accepted by fellow members, Venezuela officially suspended diamond exports for at least two years while it reorganised the sector. But visits by watchdog groups have confirmed that the trade continues, meaning that Venezuela's entire diamond production is now off the books and illegally smuggled..."Diamonds could very quickly again be at the centre of a very major problem," Smillie said.

Zero Footprint Weddings

Leaving no trace of your wedding is an impressive goal.

Work backwards. Imagine the wedding location bare and empty, and then see what you can use that will achieve this goal. Here are some ideas:

Use natural backdrops (woods, light, greenery, birds) and arrange the ceremony so people can see the outside (if you are inside) or of course use a natural setting. You don't need those arches and canopies and fake pergolas. You can also use living greenery as decoration, and replant it afterwards. Don't use tropical plants.

We performed a wedding once with 100 candles, when the power failed. Consider candlepower (up to you whether you choose vegan candles, beeswax, petroleum, etc.). People look much prettier in soft light.

Room temperature food doesn't require a kitchen. Check with a professional chef for safety of buffet foods, but you can arrange a meal that doesn't require heavy refrigeration or heat. Bambu plates (isn't that a trademark, now?) seem to be the eco-rage at present. I prefer china or glass, and big tubs to take the dirty plates home to wash.

Live acoustic music. (OK, or windup radios). Most people will have digital cameras, but consider a REAL artist to do sketches! Or a silhouette cutter.

Have recycle bins ready for any waste or compost. Be ready to take left-over food and flowers to a designated charity.

Walk, bicycle -- hire pedicabs for the elderly. Or horses. Live lightly, and have fun.

Universal Declaration of Human Rights, Marriage Ceremony

Now that we've mentioned the UN Convention on the Rights of the Child in Baby-naming ceremonies, here's the way we refer to the Universal Declaration of Human Rights in a Marriage ceremony.

The part of the ceremony called the "Intention", is where we ask each person if, being of legal age and "in sound mind and body", they are prepared to accept the other person as their legal spouse. Because not everyone in the world is given the right to decide FOR THEMSELVES when they will marry, and WHOM they will marry, we feel it is important to re-state this universal principle:

CELEBRANT:
Here is the Universal Declaration of Human Rights, Article 16

1) Men and women of full age, without any limitation due to race, nationality or religion, have the right to marry and to found a family. They are entitled to equal rights as to marriage, during marriage and at its dissolution.

(2) Marriage shall be entered into only with the free and full consent of the intending spouses.

CELEBRANT:
I will now [Name and Name] if they are willing and prepared to be married to each other.

"[Name] and [Name], Please face each other."

To each:
"[Name] are you ready to enter into this marriage with [Name], believing the love you share and your faith in each other will endure all things?"
RESPONSE: "I am."

or

Do you [name] now declare your willingness to take [name] to be your husband/wife, affirming that you have no knowledge of any impediment to your being lawfully joined in marriage? Is it your intention to wed _________ and thereby fully accept the rights and obligations of marriage?

RESPONSE: "It is my intention"

Note that this part of the ceremony is different from your wedding vows. After you have declared your INTENTION to marry, then you must say to each other that you accept the other person as your legal spouse: these are your WEDDING VOWS. You can say this in your own words, or in a traditional or modern way.

Urban or Nature? The settings/ offset dilemma

Which is more ecological? An outdoor wedding in a park, where people have to drive to get there, or an urban wedding where your guests can walk or take public transit?
Hard to tell -- depends on your own logistics. Of course you could offer a donation to a wildlife area as part of your wedding, because you don't want to go tramping through the native plants and wetlands - or you could have just the family attend an outdoor ceremony -- or have it in an urban park which needs your support --

Here's another thought: I was going to go and pick some stuff to can from an urban farm in toronto, and noted pickyourown.org. It's a primitive site, but it does discuss wedding parties at this urban farmstead. So how about a wedding/ reception at an organic farm? (provided you get there by mass transit, hybrid bus, etc.). And of course it would be great to make your dinner from their produce. I wonder if any Mennonite farms would host such a wedding -- think of the pies!

Possible list of organic farms in Ontario.

Directory of CSA (Community Supported Agriculture) farms in Ontario.
Canadian Organic Growers

Just google your state or province and find the local certified organic organization, like: NorthEast NY Organic Farming Association .

Note the Bee and Mead festival! My son made the mead for our daughter's wedding - light and dry and bubbly and delicious. (And we made the wine for his wedding - not quite dry enough :). Start planning now to make your own homemade quaffs!

HEre's a blog of interest: La Vida Locavore

United Nations Convention on the Rights of the Child - Baby Naming

Naming - so many things to say.

I like to include the UN Convention on the Rights of the Child in Baby-welcoming ceremonies. Here is Article 7:

1. The child shall be registered immediately after birth and shall have the right from birth to a name, the right to acquire a nationality and. as far as possible, the right to know and be cared for by his or her parents.

The right to a NAME and an identity should be inviolate. We often use the UN Convention, and add this poem in Baby-welcoming ceremonies:

There are three names by which a person is called:
One which her father and mother call her,
And one which people call her,
And one which she earns for herself.
The best one of these is the one that she earns for herself.

Eco-coffin

I was asked for a source of eco-coffins, and this is just a placeholder, from a Colorado company, until I do more research. I have friends who used a bamboo coffin - and a woodworker friend who built a light wood plank coffin, but you can certainly shop around. Be sure to check the eco-burial legislation in your state - things are moving fast to allow such burials.

Thanatological music: music for the end of life

A music-thanatologist.., uses music to bring comfort to the dying.

"Doctors can write lots of medical prescriptions and not get the right response,” said Dr. Stewart Mones, medical director at Sacred Heart (hospital). “There are times when no medicines are as effective as music therapy."

Music-thanatology — from Thantos, the Greek word for death — has been around in various forms for centuries. Its roots extend at least back to the monastic medicine of Benedictine monks in 11th-century Cluny, France.

As practiced today, it was developed over more than 30 years by Therese Schroeder-Sheker. Her Chalice of Repose program was located in Colorado and Montana before 2002, when it moved to Mt. Angel in the quiet farm country of the Willamette Valley south of Portland... It stresses carefully individualized “prescriptive music,” a concept Schroeder-Sheker developed in which a harpist observes the body processes and mental state of a patient and adjusts tone and tempo to match.

Music thanatologists say they use the harp for the many sounds it can make and for its warm, low, resonant tones. And it’s portable. Their vigils...are held at no cost to the patient at a growing number of hospitals and hospices across the United States and elsewhere.
(personal note: as a former harpist, I think this is an excellent program. I have met some harpists who play in nursing homes, but not at hospices).

Episcopal Church may bless equal marriage

LOS ANGELES (Reuters) The U.S. Episcopal Church gave its clergy the go-ahead on Friday to bless some same-sex unions, such as civil partnerships in states that legally recognize them, setting the stage for further conflict with the wider Anglican world.

The resolution, passed on the final day of the church's triennial national convention, also directs church leaders to develop official rites, or liturgies, for the blessing of same-sex unions -- a move that could see the church eventually change its definition of marriage.

For now, the church's official definition of marriage is a union between a man and a woman. The same-sex rites called for on Friday will be discussed and voted on at the next general church conference in three years.

Visa Weddings and international weddings

Here's a crosspost from Wedding2point0 because it's important.
If you are marrying someone from another country, do a little documenting of your relationship. Take pictures of yourselves together at home. Get a bank account together, and lots of IDs. Don't do ALL of your banking and life online, but have some paper and bricks and mortar accounts. Some people DO get married for visa reasons, and the Immigration Department would like to go after them. It's very interesting that the original link to the wire.com story is now 404, and I can't find it... hmmm

Diners Club, Mail Order Brides, Human Trafficking

Here's the info on some positive action from Change.org.

"It's not every day that we get contacted by a billion-dollar corporation agreeing to change a business practice our members find ethically objectionable. But that's exactly what happened to Change.org this week.

It all started when our Human Trafficking blogger, Amanda Kloer, posted news that the credit card company Diners Club International had established a partnership with a Vietnamese mail-order brides company to jointly offer an official payment plan for buying women on credit. (No, sadly this was no joke.)

The post provoked an immediate reaction from the Change.org community, and nearly a thousand Change.org members sent emails to representatives of Diners Club demanding an end to the program due to its gross commodification of women and the vulnerability of mail-order brides to human trafficking, domestic violence, abuse, and exploitation."

Quaker Ceremonies: things to admire

We have incorporated several Quaker traditions in our ceremonies. The Humanist Society, which is our national Celebrant's organization, actually began as the Humanist Society of Friends, a Quaker offshoot, in 1930, so it's quite natural to use these roots.

A moment of silence, when the Groom and Bride simply sit quietly, and so do the guests, reaching their inner selves, is quite lovely. The role of the couple in speaking to each other simply and personally is admirable, and the simple Quaker vow, "I accept you into my heart as my husband/wife" is lovely.

Also, we sometimes incorporate the community signing of the marriage certificate, similar to a Jewish Ketubah. Here's an example:

"For members of the Society of Friends, also known as Quakers, the signing of the wedding certificate at the end of the traditional wedding ceremony denotes that the couple is officially married in the eyes of the community. It is hung afterwards in the couple’s home to serve as a reminder of the vows they made to each other and the people who were there to share in their wedding.
Amanda and David have chosen to have a wedding certificate today in honor of David’s Quaker upbringing.

They will now sign the certificate in confirmation of the vows they have just taken.
[David and Amanda sign the certificate.]

David and Amanda have asked that their parents be the first witnesses to sign their marriage certificate. [Their Parents sign].

They ask that all of you sign the certificate as well following the ceremony, as a lasting record of your presence here tonight and a token of your love and support.

Equal marriage: New Hampshire in the fold

CONCORD, N.H. — Gov. John Lynch said Thursday he will sign a bill to make his state the sixth to legalize gay marriage as soon as the Legislature makes some changes, which legislative leaders immediately said they would back.

Lynch asked that the already-approved legislation be revised to better protect churches and their employees against lawsuits if their beliefs preclude them from marrying gays. Gay marriage supporters said they do not object.

"Throughout history, our society's views of civil rights have constantly evolved and expanded," Lynch told reporters. "New Hampshire's great tradition has always been to come down on the side of individual liberties and protections."